Saying Goodbye to a “Bad” Staff Member

Saying goodbye to bad staff member creates a real “opportunity”.  There are so many things that come into play in this situation.  Here are a few questions that I’ve personally had to deal with and I know there are at least a thousand more…

• Do you tell the congregation why they are leaving?
• How much do you tell?  Part of the story?  All of the story?  None of the story?
• Who do you tell?
• How can you keep unity among those that love the staff member leaving?  Do you need to worry about unity?
• How can you show grace, mercy, love, and forgiveness while still showing them the door?
• Do you try and protect the staff member?
• Do you try and protect the family of the staff member?
• Do you throw them a party?
• Give them a gift?
• Send them away like you do a “Good Staff Member”?

Oh, so many questions and so many answers.  Honestly, there is not a right or wrong answer to each of these questions. 

Here are a few things that I’ve done in this situation:

• Pray.  Pray.  Pray again. Pray more.  Pray longer.  Pray! Pray! Pray!  Am I getting the point across?
• Answer questions like Jesus would have answered them.  Tell the truth in love! Nothing more.  Nothing less.  No comments.  No opinions. Nothing more!
• Protect those that need protection.  (ie family members, the church, etc.)
• Treat them like Jesus would have treated them.  Send them off so that others will think they were a “Good Staff Member”.  Why would you do this you may ask?  Two reasons:
  • It’s better to be nice than a jerk. 
  • It’s easier to find their replacement if you have treated the person that just left in an honorable fashion.
• Don’t “spin” the situation!  If pressed, tell more of the story.  Notice that I didn’t say tell it all.  Just like you don’t have to tell a 4yr old everything when they ask, “Where do babies come from?”  You don’t usually have to tell everyone everything.
• Tell those that need to know what they need to know.  This would especially apply to the staff that is still employed.  When someone is let go or leaves on a bad note it affects EVERYONE left behind.  Trust me, it will take time for them to think and believe that they are not the next one to be let go.  Talk to them, Talk to them. Talke to them.  And then do it more than one time!
• When another church calls asking for a reference, BY ALL MEANS, tell them what happened at your church.  BUCK UP and don’t wimp out!  Don’t let someone else go through what you just went through.  Let them know the truth and decide if they want to move forward with them.  Far too many pastors and churches are hurt because someone from their last church didn’t “Speak the truth in love” (Eph 4:15) when giving a reference.  Ok, I’m done preaching….

Lastly, before you make a bad staff member’s leaving “An Event to Remember (in a bad way)” understand that there WILL be tidal waves to that tsunami.  Are you ready to ride them out?  Is that what will honor God?

I certainly don’t have all the answers to this difficult situation.  I’m just one person with my own thoughts and my own experiences.  But, I have had to deal with this type of a situation, and will probably have to again in the future.  If you are currently dealing with a “Bad” staff situation, I would HIGHLY suggest seeking Godly counsel from others before you take ANY drastic steps.

Hope these thoughts help!